Ex- England skipper Lewis Moody has disclosed he has been found to have motor neurone disease and acknowledged he cannot yet deal with the full ramifications of the muscle-degenerating condition that took the lives of fellow rugby players Doddie Weir and Rob Burrow.
The 47-year-old, who was a member of the 2003 Rugby World Cup-winning side and lifted several English and European titles with Leicester, appeared on BBC Breakfast 14 days after learning he has the disease.
"There's something about looking the future in the face and hesitating to fully comprehend that at the moment," he stated.
"It isn't that I fail to comprehend where it's progressing. We understand that. But there is certainly a hesitation to face what's ahead for now."
Moody, talking together with his wife Annie, states conversely he feels "peaceful" as he concentrates on his immediate wellbeing, his family and getting ready for when the illness worsens.
"Possibly that's trauma or possibly I handle situations uniquely, and once I have the information, it's more manageable," he continued.
Early Signs
Moody learned he had MND after noticing some reduced power in his shoulder area while training in the gym.
After physical therapy didn't help the issue, a set of scans revealed nerve cells in his central nervous system had been damaged by MND.
"You're given this condition identification of MND and we're rightly very emotional about it, but it's rather peculiar because I think everything is fine," he continued.
"I don't experience unwell. I don't sense sick
"My symptoms are very minor. I have a bit of muscle loss in the hand area and the shoulder.
"I'm still able to doing anything and everything. And optimistically that will continue for as long as is feasible."
Disease Progression
MND can develop quickly.
As per the non-profit MND Association, the illness takes the lives of a 33% of people within a twelve months and above half within two years of identification, as ingestion and respiration become harder.
Treatment can only delay deterioration.
"It isn't ever me that I experience sorrow for," commented an emotional Moody.
"It's the sorrow around having to inform my mum - as an sole offspring - and the implications that has for her."
Family Effect
Talking from the family home with his wife and their canine companion by his side, Moody was overcome with feeling when he spoke about breaking the news to his sons - teenage Dylan and 15-year Ethan - the devastating news, stating: "That represented the most difficult thing I've ever had to do."
"They're two brilliant boys and that was pretty heartbreaking," Moody said.
"We positioned ourselves on the couch in weeping, Ethan and Dylan both embraced in each other, then the dog leapt across and began licking the drops off our faces, which was rather amusing."
Moody explained the priority was being in the now.
"There exists no treatment and that is why you have to be extremely militantly directed on just embracing and enjoying each moment now," he commented.
"As my wife mentioned, we've been very blessed that the primary decision I made when I concluded playing was to devote as much duration with the kids as attainable. We won't recover those times back."
Athlete Link
Elite athletes are unevenly impacted by MND, with studies indicating the rate of the illness is up to six times greater than in the general population.
It is thought that by limiting the O2 accessible and causing harm to nerve cells, regular, vigorous training can initiate the disease in those previously predisposed.
Rugby Career
Moody, who gained 71 England appearances and traveled with the British and Irish Lions in New Zealand in 2005, was called 'Mad Dog' during his playing career, in honour of his courageous, unwavering approach to the game.
He participated through a stress fracture of his leg for a duration with Leicester and once sparked a practice altercation with colleague and friend Martin Johnson when, annoyed, he left a tackle pad and commenced throwing himself into physical contacts.
After coming on as a substitute in the Rugby World Cup final win over Australia in 2003, he secured a ball at the rear of the throw-in in the crucial moment of play, creating a platform for playmaker Matt Dawson to advance and Jonny Wilkinson to execute the victory-securing drop kick.
Assistance Community
Moody has previously informed Johnson, who skippered England to that championship, and a handful of other ex- players about his medical situation, but the rest will be learning his news with the rest of public.
"There will be a moment when we'll need to depend on their backing but, at the present, just having that kind of care and acknowledgment that people are available is all that matters," he commented.
"Rugby is such a great family.
"I mentioned to the kids the other day, I've had an amazing life.
"Even if it concluded now, I've appreciated all of it and embraced all of it and got to do it with exceptional people.
"Being able to label your passion your career, it's one of the most significant blessings.
"Having accomplished it for so long a period with the squads that I did it with was a delight. And I am aware they will want to support in every way they can and I anticipate having those discussions."
